Monday 27 June 2011

No Regret Rien - Apprentice Series 7 Episode 8

Fromage Frais, Chaise Longue, Petit Pois. By the standards of most of the Apprentice candidates who headed to Paris for the latest task, those six words mean I should probably change my name to Pierre.

It was an episode which saw the demise of a potential winner and the emergence of a killer queen in the shape of Melody who was anything but tuneful in her savagery. Dynamite with a laser beam she turned her attention quite squarely on Leon and Tom who were left reeling by her scary, yet somehow impressive display. Fair play to Melody who revelled in the task as a fluent French speaker, but went too far in alienating Leon, destroying Tom's strategy and hogging sales. But let's face it; this is the Apprentice not the real world, so she was probably toasted for her shameless performance with a glass of Moet and Chandon from a pretty cabinet. I'd get very worried if Melody was ever brought into translate on negotiations between two nations. Chances are if she took a dislike to you, you could very quickly find an admission that you were wrong, turning into an offer to 'step outside' and be none the wiser.

Tom continues to intrigue. For the first time he was forced to reveal his 'real life' track record in fighting against elimination. Having done so what was obvious was that, along with most of the other candidates, Tom's problem on this task was getting swept up by the fact they were in a foreign country rather than concentrating on the key aspects of engaging with buyers. It is a task he admits to doing regularly as part of his real life with buyers and suppliers across the Far East. The pressure of the Apprentice threw all these skills out of the window and he now risks being firmly in Lord Sugar's point of doom.

One candidate sure to divide opinion is bouncy Bambi, Susan. Now, since King Henry brought the Dauphin to his knees with a bunch of Robin Hood extras (yes I know) there has been a healthy rivalry with our friends across the channel (or la Manche - Pierre). Indeed it is fair to say that the banter is the basis of any Anglo-French meet. Susan took this to a whole new level, in her own way, in launching a series of bizarre statements including 'Do the French like their children?'. The look of disbelief on Karren Brady's face probably rivals many of Nick 'The Face' Hewer's very best.

Having ensured she is unlikely to gain any employment 'en France' any time soon, she should still be complimented on her performance in leading the team to a near record win. Helen again impressed with a massive order that rivalled Liz Locke's record breaking sale last year. She somehow remains difficult to back as a winner though, perhaps suffering from the bizarre scenario where she has yet to face the boardroom and show us who she is. It's not her fault though as she just keeps winning.

What was clear from this week’s Paris task was that when tasked with selling to buyers, be they foreign or domestic, having a clear plan and thoroughly researching the business you are sat in front of is essential. Test runs of products are all well and good and should be what you are aiming for, but insulting a buyer by offering an inappropriate amount is suicide. I'm sure no product developer reading this blog would dream of offering a business the size of Argos 10 units as a test quantity. That is the equivalent of what Logic offered the French powerhouse retailer La Redoute.

Believe it or not we only have four weeks left, so who is your money on?


Star of the Week: Helen Louise Milligan. Who else could it be with a sale as big as that.

Got Lucky: Tom Pellereau.  Got stitched up by Melody but should've been stronger.

Heading for a Fall: Helen Louise Milligan.  A record sale isn't enough to keep anyone in the Apprentice, just ask Liz Locke.  She needs to carry on her current upward trajectory or a nasty fall could happen.

For Twitter updates on The Apprentice don't forget to follow me @simonbrooke

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